Help!!! I Want to Stay With My Side Piece!

Men often find themselves in the predicament of deciding if they should start something new with their side piece or stay in their current relationship. This is a decision a man must make for himself but what I can tell you is through my experience, most high value men that leave their wife or their girlfriend end up regretting the decision because the person they left their relationship for wasn't worth it, and they should have tried more ways to get the satisfaction they were looking for. There is a right way and a wrong way to do this. Most info available will just tell a man to just break up as if it was deciding whether to get tacos or burgers for lunch. This article goes much deeper and connects with a man's struggle through real experiences.

Adrian is no stranger to having side pieces throughout his relationship and he did it in a way that his wife Chloe never found out. They started dating in graduate school and got engaged before they finished. On paper their match was perfect, both valued family, wanted to raise 2 kids in a private Christian school, and loved sports. Adrian fell in love quickly with Chloe even though he didn't want to admit it. She was attractive and flirty and hit it off well with his family. He learned quickly that Chloe was as loyal as she was patient. He was an extrovert, the life at the party while she preferred to stay home and read with a bottle of wine. He liked that about her and they felt it was a good balance. When they first dated, Chloe had no expectations about the relationship. She had seen the ups and downs from her now divorced parents and through her own experiences she knew nothing was perfect, so when Adrian told her they would be together for the long haul, she liked the words but knew things could change without a warning. Over time their feelings moved completely in opposite directions. She grew more and more in love with Adrian, while he felt like something was missing. He felt like he owed it to Chloe to stay in the relationship. She stuck by him through his downs and he didn't know if he was going through a phase or his feelings faded because he wasn't in love with her anymore.

Chloe wasn't the type to like to party but Adrian like to be out whenever he could. It allowed him to blow off steam in a highly stressful job. One night while partying with friends he met Tiffany, who was the total opposite of his girlfriend. A free spirit that would be down to leave town on a days notice just for the experience of being in a new city and emerging herself in a new culture. After getting to know Tiffany, the hole he was missing seemed to be filled. She didn't care about career, and could relate to Adrian on a deeper level because she came from the same family background. Tiffany knew about Chloe and didn't care. Their relationship continued to grow. She respected the time that he had with his wife but made it known that she was willing to fight for his attention. Months went by and she finally said, it's time to leave her so we can start our lives together.

Adrian found himself picturing what a life with Tiffany would look like but he didn't want to hurt Chloe. Over the next few weeks he did soul searching to ultimately find out what he truly wanted. He came to the realization, his relationship had run it's course and wanted to be with Tiffany. So now what?

If you decide you want to pursue things with your side piece for something more serious, you can wait for the car crash or you can take control and start the breakup process, respectfully! All roads lead to one of those two options. If you try to maintain the relationship with your girlfriend or wife and grow the relationship with the side piece, you're destined for a dramatic hurtful, expensive and resentful end. By trying to cover your tracks on your own, eventually your partner will find out and make no doubt about it, it will cost you everything. She will be resentful, and make it her mission to make your life as hard as humanly possible. The other possibility is your mistress will expect that you're taking steps to end your current relationship and therefore rationalize sabotaging it if things don't move on her timeline. In her mind you are going to end the relationship anyway, she's helping you move it along, not caring about the collateral damage it will cause your friends, family and mental stability. This won't be her fault, it will be 100% yours. You must make absolute sure, you want to be with your side piece. It's not just a comparison of your partner for the side piece. It's a comparison of what you're gaining but also what your giving up. If you're married that could be half. If you decide your mistress is worth it, build a plan to take 100% control of your destiny. You have to end it with your current girlfriend or wife. Tell her the reasons why, and let her know you don't see a future with her where you are both happy and fulfilled. Sounds cruel? That's far less painful than the alternative. If you are married, have the discussion with a divorce attorney so they can walk you through the steps and timeline, and the assets you will lose in the relationship. Think through the transition plan of where you will live while you're going through the breakup (preferably live in different places).

Here's the part most men miss. You also must make sure you have your expectations aligned with your side piece after this break up. Will you move in together? If you're going to live separately, does she have permission to come by anytime she wants? Is your relationship now public? She may be under the impression you two are now in a relationship, while you want time to heal. Also, men often don't define how much communication they will have with their ex after the breakup. Your ex will have questions about what she did wrong, she will want to see you and have another conversation, she may want to call you late at night when she feels like it's too much to handle. You need to a plan for how much of yourself you will give to the old relationship and what are your new boundaries.

I've helped high value men avoid the relationship car crashes that cause stress, bankruptcy and can ultimately result in losing everything. There is a right way and a wrong way for men to stay with their side piece. This article gives the beginning steps but it's a journey that must be done right. Men often go wrong by taking too much time to take control of their relationship. They rationalize staying in a relationship with their wife while continuing seeing their side piece, as a way to control their own future on their schedule, not realizing they increase their odds for losing both. High value men do deserve relationship freedom but they have a responsibility to do so respectfully.